Striking HomeSpring 1996, Page 3 |
Home Row Story by Jenny Guy The Tale: Edith's Sis and Son |
![]() The hot sun shone on the Indiana house as Edith and Aunt Denise ate. "I detest onions" said Denise. "Onions nauseate one." "Then don't eat the hash. Taste the tuna dish instead" said Edith. Then she added, "This heat is unsuited to the season." Edith's son, Sean, hesitated to eat the hash, too. Aunt Denise dotes on Sean. He ate nineteen donuts and a honied Danish instead. A sudden noise - Santa on the house! Anon, Santa stood in the hot ashes. He had the dented antenna in his hand. "Hide!" said Sean. "Santa is in the house! He shuns those not hidden." Sean, Edith and Denise headed to the shed to hide. Sean had hidden his Nintendo in the shed, too. He used it as he sat, hidden. Denise and Edith detested Nintendo. "Hush" hissed Denise. "I hate Nintendo noise." A toad sat in its nest in the shed. The toad's tune soothed Denise and Edith. Then Santa nodded his nose and dashed South and East to a hot destination, an oasis in the sand dunes. Denise, Edith and Sean hastened into the house to see the doodads Santa had hidden. Santa had donated a dinette set, hats, suede shoes and a stone statue, tied in thin, tinted satin. "This is insane! shouted the astounded Sean. "No Nintendo add-ons! No hot sound set! I hinted to Santa.... Toss that dinette set out!" Denise steadied Sean. "The dinette set is not the issue" she said. "Don't sound so snide. Eat that sundae and shush." Sean ate his sundae. Edith noshed on sushi. Denise tasted tahini on toast. The sun set and Sean, soothed and sated, nested 'neath satin sheets. His head nodded. The siesta done, the sun tinted the stone house anon. Sun shone in the sash. needed a tissue. He had the snottiest nose and sinuses. "I need a tetanus shot" he said. "No" said Edith. "Eat toast and hot tea. Then eat anise-seasoned hash, Thai tuna, oats, nuts and seeds, and not those donuts and sodas. Those assist diseases. Aunt Denise, shod in suede shoes, dashes to the Senate on a steed. Denise has a seat in the Senate. Undaunted, Denise assists Innuit Indians to attain statehood. She shuns the tainted toadies indited on handouts. Dutious Denise shines as Athena shines. She unites the hidden Indian nations, intent as she is on issues, and detests those odious, dishonest asses that assassinate due to insinuation and innuendo. One odious ass has set out to unseat Denise. He dishes out heated taunts. Honest Denise stands in steadiness on issues. The data is in, odds on Denise. She is ahead. He desists. Denise sits and has a soda. The ashen, ousted, stunned, shunned, dishonest idiot that had set out to unseat Denise does not hesitate. He hastens out. Denise's aide is honest and stout. He is saddened at that nonunion idiot's innuendoes. "Shoot" intones Denise, "That's the Senate. Eat these nuts and dates." |
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| MacKeyCaps: A better way to draw those layouts |
| Here at Dvorak International headquarters, we are always looking for a
better (and easier) way to do things. One improvement we recently made is a
switch in our key cap font. You may have noticed that our back cover looks
different from past issues. This is because, not only have we shown the Dvorak
left hand layout instead of the ANSI standard layout, but also because we are
using a different font. The new font is called MacKeyCaps. This beautiful font is the creation of Chris Sansom. Besides being very nice to look at, it is extremely versatile. Diagramming layouts can now be done in a fraction of the time that it used to take, and resizing is no longer an issue. Chris has even waived the shareware fee for Dvorak International. You can expect to see a lot more of MacKeyCaps as we gradually phase it into our literature. Thanks again, Chris. (Chris Sansom works for a company called Highway57. If you have Internet access, check out their web site at http:/www.highway57.co.uk.) |
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